April 10, 2012

Today was my niece Mariah's 5th birthday.

She is the funniest, smartest, most awesome baby that I've ever had in my life. She is just amazing.

She calls me "Chicken Head" among other funny names. I call her "Jerk Chicken".

We had a party for her at Me and Earl's old Pre-School. Such a walk down memory lane. Literally I haven't been in that building in 20 years. My picture was still on the wall and I look EXACTLY the same.

Of course all the 4-5 year olds gravitated to me. You know Auntie NIA love the kids. There was one lil sweet pea that sat on my lap the entire time. We played and talked about her family and her recent family vacation to Florida. She was nice and polite, petite and precious. I HAVE to remember to bring her the candy I promised her.

Her name was Taryn Marsh.

N*

I. Chant.

Nam-Myo-Ho-Renge-Kyo has gotten me through so many days.

As I embrace this journey of Buddhism, I chant every day, all day. It's helping me to stay calm about situations I can no longer control.

I chant because it keeps me balanced and reminds me that my happiness is imperative and possible.

N*

Friday the 6th

Crazy day in the heart department.

Cried so hard at the office today.... My boss that I was having an allergic reaction.

N*

Friday

I will post a video later. I have a lot to get off my chest.

Don't feel like writing.

N*

Energtic

Dedicated to Jay.

Lifeless moments interact with sparks of energy.
More than the balance it creates,
Notice how the energy causes shakes.
Vibrations and pulsations.
Random and underappreciated.
You are...
Underappreciated and random.
Shaking the neutrons in my darkness
Causing illumination
A warm tingling sensation.
Makes me wonder how energy feels
Or how negative and positive come together to seal the deal.
I should have walked away right from the very start
But the energy held me against my will
Supernaturally
And it happened constantly
The push and pull
The positive and negative
The reaction
The vibration
The sensation
The illumination
You are...

N*

Insecurities

They are so real.
Showing their face and true colors and ass in the most inappropriate times.
Insecurities, unfortunately have no boundaries, no relationship restrictions, and no how of understanding....
What you and I, me or he have been through.

I pray that you find balance and comfort in your life,
Your heart,
Your soul.
That would be a sight to behold.

N*

Why is it so hard to find someone that will keep me calm throughout my days?

A balancing force to help me get through these stressful days.

N*

I can't wait.....

Until it rains in the summer.

N*

Slightly frustrated

I'm going to scale back on my advancements, interest, and pursuits.

It's not getting me anywhere.

AND

All the wrong people are pursuing me. Blah!!

Happy Belated Single Awareness Day!

N*

Stuck.